Chapter 48

Loom of the Fruit

Wouldn’t it be interesting if what is seen is not what occurred?

If the brain creates disorder from order,

not by mistake,

but to force what needs to happen.

Not confusion.

Construction.

If the sequence shifts,

does the meaning change?

What if they were on backward that morning when he left?


I woke up before his alarm.
Lying silently, listening to him breathing.
The clock made a click just before the alarm went off. I braced myself not to jump.

It was still dark out.

Robert never sets an alarm on Saturday.

“Hey, what’s up?”  I questioned.

“I decided to go for a run this morning.
Tansy and I are going to start training for marathons.
I’ll be back for breakfast.” 

He paused and fumbled with something in the room.

“Do you know where Flora put my running shoes?”

“Why don’t you cut the light on?  I’m awake.
She’s a creature of habit.
They are probably in my closet next to the jeans.”

We have been married for fifteen years.
He always had strong legs.
His jockey shorts fit him right.
They must be new.
The beer belly was well earned.

“I didn’t mean to wake you up.
I was trying to be quiet.”

“It’s fine.
You know I can sleep anywhere, anytime.
I’ll drop back off soon enough.”

And I did.

I woke up when I heard the front door close.
He was right, two hours.
Footfall up the stairs.
That one step always creaked.
He stopped in the bathroom.

The sun was up now.

“You’re awake?”

“I am now.”

“I’m going to hit the shower.

I’ll be out in a minute.”

“Robert, why is your underwear on backward?”

“What?”

I sat on the edge of the bed.

“Your underwear.
They were frontwards this morning.
Now they are backwards.” 

He removed the garment in question and discarded it inside out onto the floor.

“There’s no way you can know that.”

“The lights were on.

I saw them.”

“Well, I’m telling you that you have no proof and you are wrong.”

“Of course.”

He went into the bathroom to shower.

I sat.

Thinking…

Wondering…

Is the thing in front of me something I actually want to keep?

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